Wednesday, April 23, 2008

I'm Back Ya'll

I’ve been toying with the idea of starting this blog up again, clearly starting it won out. I don’t have my good friend to talk to about such things, so I will have to reach out to the blogger community for their comments.

Dating sucks! I know it’s a means to an end, but the game and finding the right connections are such a chore. The men in my life right now have me so ‘noid (annoyed not paranoid).

Situation #1:
I met this dude about two years ago, really in passing, but we seem to keep bumping into each other so I he’s interested, he seems nice, I give him the number. The conversation is BORING as hell. I really know very little about him because he spends the majority of the time telling me about the famous people he works with. Am I suppose to like him for him or for the people he knows? And then ya’ll wonder why women in Atlanta are so star struck…


Situation #2:
Let me begin by saying I LOVE gay black men. One of my ex’s is now gay, but let him know I said that, he prefers bi, but if you have only had dick for the last 5 years, you are gay. But this isn’t about him. I met this new guy online. Once again, he seemed nice, a little churchy, but maybe I need a little of that. Online, the conversation was cool so I give him the number so we can connect. Offline his conversation sucks! I feel like I’m struggling for things to talk about when I’m on the phone with him, but I’m trying to go outside of my normal. I overlooked the fact that he directs choir and sings at/plans weddings, but the signs started appearing and my gaydar went way high! Sign number 1: At least once or twice a week he has to tell me he’s not gay. What straight man does that? Sign number 2: I have heard him scream like a little girl for whatever reason on two occasions at least, and he has had the twang (not trying to stereotype, but ya’ll know). Sign number 3: He went to get his locs twisted by his “brother”. His brother is a truck driver and he previously told me they don’t even really get along. I don’t know ya’ll, but I don’t know of men, let alone truck drivers that are going to twist another man’s hair. I just want him to stop being dishonest with himself.


Situation #3:
I met this guy almost a year ago. Right off the bat I was attracted to him, but strangely I was annoyed by him as well. It may have been the fact that he wouldn’t leave my side from the time he walked up to me. I gave him my number under an assumed name and assumed I never hear from him again. WRONG. He kept calling and I kept sending it to voicemail, but he was persistent so I finally gave him and saw him about 6 months later. He was still annoying, but sexy as ever so I let him hit. I must say I thoroughly enjoyed myself, so when the opportunity arose again about 3 months later; we hooked up again despite the fact that in the interim I discovered he was married. Hey, a woman has needs. This time it wasn’t as good. He wasn’t listening when I said I had had enough of one activity or wanted to try a different position. It was like he had to be in control of how everything went. That happens to be how our conversations go as well. Later, he complained that I was selfish because I wouldn’t give oral or stroke his dick or touch him the way he wanted to be touched. I was cool, at first. I first pointed out that I already put it out there up front that oral was out of the question. At the same time, I was trying to understand exactly what it was he wanted me to do that I didn’t do. When he finished his two hour rant I explained to him that what he wanted I reserve for real relationships, not fuck sessions. We agreed to disagree. The subject came up again yesterday and this time I was pissed because it was his same argument about what HE wanted and what HE didn’t get and what HE was use to. Then he let the words fall, “I care about you and when two people care about each other they should care about what the other wants.” Well, there’s the disconnect, I don’t care about him, I just liked the sex. I guess I better walk away before this gets really ugly. Damn, I can’t do celibacy again so I guess I will have to pull out the big guns this time around.

No comments: